Dropping the ball

One day we forget that time keeps going. It moves on in seconds and priceless moments that we fight to regain but never will. I can not say if I am pleased with the time that has passed me by, or the changes that this passing time has brought me. Friends come and go. We find ourselves so close to another person, but still strugle to let them completly know our hearts. Thank God I have him so some one else knows my heart because there are moments when I don't even know it. For a short time in our very significant lives we crash into others and make conections. We can not really tell if they are big conections or small conections, yet we make them. I realize that I am the type of person who makes lots of conections, but more times then none will let them slip away from me. How odd is it that I can be decribed as a person with a fear of being left behind or abandoned so I push people a side in my own way and feel abondoned because they let me do it. I know that I need to find a place in myself where I can learn not to push or have a fear of being pushed.

I can not take back anything. I can not regret my actions because on some level of being that is what I wanted. I can't help but think of all the good memories I have had, and what I have chosen to miss out on. Lord help me find content and resolution for the issues I face.

I drop the ball. I have walked away from the game and wondered why no one has come after me and sought out my company. I am making an attempt to change this behavior in myself. I don't expect people to understand this. I try. I am trying.

My Job

I have realized that I do enjoy my job while I am there.... So as long as it does not cause me an intense amount of problems from this point on I will not be looking for a new job and will keep the one I have. There are worse jobs to have, so I really shouldn't cry and moan about it.

On a different note, the 21st is the first day of spring. Hooray! I love warm weather and bright sunshine. I am really hoping that this patch of warm weather stays with us this time. Nothing was better then the warm 60 degrees we had last week.


I am one hundered percent sure that Jesus hates winter. No doubt about it.



God bless!